How to Write Your Own Wedding Vows
Writing personalised wedding vows might seem difficult, but it can be massively rewarding. Here a few simple steps to follow to take the pressure off and help you put down the words that will stay with you for the rest of your life.
Make sure you’ve got permission. Is your partner OK with you writing your own vows? Will they be writing their own too? If so, do you plan on working on them together, or leaving it as a surprise for the big day? Is your venue aware that you will provide your vows?
It’s essential that you are all on the same page from the very beginning. For this reason, these are all questions that need to be answered before you get down to the business of putting pen, or keyboard, to paper.
Learn from the masters. Read as much of you can. Try and find other vows you like, love poetry or prose, or any other writing that inspires you. Feel free to borrow as much or as little you like, or just take inspiration from the tone and structure. It’s completely up to you.
Get over your writers’ block. Of course, this is easier said than done. The blank page might seem forbidding, but there’s several techniques you can use to get the words flowing.
First of all, just write whatever comes to mind. Don’t worry if it sounds cheesy or awkward – the important thing is to just get started. Think about your partner and how you met, the moment you knew you had fallen in love, your first kiss.
If that doesn’t work, try a tape recorder. Again, just talk freely until you hit on something that you feel you can work with. There’s no need to rush, so be patient and take your time.
Remember why you are doing this. There’s a reason that you’ve chosen to write your own vows, and that’s because the traditional ones just don’t resonate with you. Think about what makes you different, and what you want to celebrate with your words. This is your ceremony, so make it as personal and individual as you like.
Draft and redraft. Keep reading over what you’ve written, and revise it until you think you’ve got it just right. Then leave it for a couple of days and do the same again. And again. And again.
Practice, practice, practice. By rehearsing your vows out loud, you’ll begin to find a natural rhythm to your speech. Keep practising until you can say them without looking at the paper – this will take much less time than you may think. By doing this, you’ll feel much more confident when it comes to the big moment, meaning that you can concentrate on enjoying yourself rather than worrying about tripping over your words.